I was consulting with a group of supervisors on their supervision this morning (online with EFT supervisors from many different locations), and we were discussing how we experience and perceive things differently when we are triggered by shame and fear, especially when we consider vulnerably sharing or taking a risk. Just like our clients do (ey we're all people, right?!)
Those moments of facing an attachment fear or feeling unworthy and turning towards sharing are often described as standing on the ledge.
Well, guess what the supervisors getting consultation do in this group? They courageously stand on the ledge.
They bring a video of their consulting work and get reviewed. It's a fabulous and smart thing to do. Multi-layered as it is.
One of the group members was courageously owning a piece of appearance shame in anticipating showing a video tape of her work. Ladies, for sure, I know you can relate. Dr. Priscilla Zynda, EFT Supervisor in Denver, Colorado told her, it was okay, and then said this zinger, “It's just distortion from the ledge.”
We were all wowed at that great summary of what happens. Distortion from the ledge.
What does that distortion sound like? Well, everyone is different but you can watch for your self-critic (“What am I thinking, I'll never be good enough.), experiencing a hot or hidden emotional response (frustration or numbing) or moving into action that takes you away from vulnerability (bossing or placating).
For most of us, when we become aware of our triggered response we are able to share and step into, rather than away from, our vulnerability. And with vulnerability comes connection. With connection comes movement away from the ledge. We're safe when we're connected.
So, here's to more safe sharing and recognizing when you'reon the ledge.
If you have a ‘on the ledge' distortion or experience you'd like to share, please feel free to leave your comment section below.